Saturday, December 6, 2008

Yo, Meathead!

Holy guacamole! Is there a bigger jerk in the NFL right now than Plaxico Burress? From Super Bowl to Super Bust!

Good ol’ Plax found a way to get me off writing article after article praising the New York Giants. Now I can rip him up.

I mean, what was this guy thinking? It’s pretty hard to fall so low from heights so high after catching the winning touchdown in the Super Bowl last year. How stupid do you have to be, not only to break New York gun laws by bringing a loaded but unregistered firearm into a crowded nightclub, but then to shoot yourself in the leg with the gun? Even if the weapon was registered, Burress has shown the world that he’s way too dumb to own a gun. Why wasn’t the weapon’s safety on? He could be considered a worse ass than Terrell Owens or Chad Ocho Cinco (Johnson), because at least those two prima donnas never brought guns into their selfish little worlds (that we know of).

Now Burress has possibly cost himself as much as $27 million, which he could lose out on if the Giants franchise decides it’s had enough. While General Manager Jerry Reese left the door slightly open on a Plaxico redux, my guess here is that Burress will not play another down in a Giants uniform, even if he avoids jail time. The Giants were probably just covering themselves in case the players’ union starts crying that the team terminated him unfairly, or without due process, or whatever sad excuse they can come up with. But this franchise has a history of class, and I’d bet that this new generation of Giants owners will do the right thing, just like their dads. Sayonara, Plax! Don’t let the door hit you in the butt on the way out!

I’ve seen a lot of sportswriters this past week say the Giants are toast, and with all the distractions, including linebacker Antonio Pierce’s involvement the night of the shooting, there’s no way they can repeat as champions. I say, let’s see what happens against the Eagles on Sunday. If the Giants can win decisively, or even come back from a deficit in the final minutes (and clinch the NFC East and a playoff spot in the process), I’d say the team is going to be fine, and they will be just as dangerous come the playoffs. If the Giants falter this week, then anything goes—they could still win it all, or another team (Dallas, Pittsburgh, Tennessee) could find a way to halt the juggernaut. Let’s face it—Big Blue has never made the playoffs the year after a Super Bowl appearance, so just doing that would be a victory of a sort for the franchise. But I doubt highly that staff, players, and fans would be too satisfied with a one-and done-performance, or even a loss in the NFC Championship Game. With an 11–1 record at this point, I think anything less than a Super Bowl appearance would be considered something of a flop.

As for Burress, the question now is whether or not he goes to prison, and if so, will it end a promising career far short of where it could have gone? Is Plaxico Burress done in the NFL, or will he get another shot—this year, or some other time, down the line?

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